It snows here in Minnesota. But you know that. We are getting snow again today. And by snow I mean SNOW.
You outsiders—here are some things about how we do snow up here in Minnesota that you probably don’t know.
We shovel snow better than anyone else. We have a variety of snow shovels like you have kitchen knives. We have the heavy one, made of metal, so we can just push the snow aside. This works great when there’s only three inches or so. We have the funny shaped one, made of plastic, for the heavier snows, so we can lift it. Oh, we also have snow BLOWERS. These run on gas and blow the snow into the neighbor’s yard. Since they run on gas, they don’t work all the time; hence, the snow shovel rules. I forgot, we also have an ice pick type shovel to get the ice off the walk, too. Pictured: the snow fairy.
Our crack local weatherman, Paul Douglas, predicts between one to two feet of snow, yet today.
Some people hire their people to shovel snow. There are lots of guys with four-wheel drive pick-ups with massive blades on the front who will do your driveway. A short driveway costs you $25-40, well worth it in missed chiropractor appointments. Some people here have their own big snow blowers for their driveways. Those blow the snow past the neighbor and over to Wisconsin. I decided to buy another car instead. An S-U-V. D’oh. I do have a little snow blower that won’t start.
You may be wondering about our streets. Fair enough, because I know your own city’s snow removal program is called SPRING. But we (they) are awesome at this. If you go out on our beltway this morning, you will see three or four ginormous snow plow trucks with blades, with salt shakers behind them, in a row, cleaning off four lanes of road in one sweep (see pic above). They can go for hours doing this. For most Minnesotans, the popularity rank order goes–Governor, the high school hockey coach, then snow plow drivers. We love those guys.
We also shovel the snow off our roofs. No, really. If you don’t, you see, when it melts, the dreaded ice dam happens and I don’t need to tell you the mess that makes inside. In fact, near where I live, Max McGee, the ex-ex-Packer fell off his roof getting leaves off the roof before he had to shovel snow off later. He was 75.
We’re crazy like that. I mean every year someone dies because they drove their snowmobile too close to the open water on the lake. “Hey Billy, let’s see how close we can get to the edge of the ice!!”
But ever since the McGee accident, and as soon as it snows six inches, Minnesota wives start asking,”Honey, isn’t it about time to do the roof?” I think they know something.
Sunday Follow Up. Reports showed that it snowed a bit less than 20 inches yesterday. But it did collapse the MetroDome at 5 am this morning, see it happen here: http://www.newser.com/story/107387/vikings-dome-collapses-in-blizzard.html
MetroDome officials hired some men to crawl up there and shovel THAT roof. Wives are calling the Caved Roof Hotline, volunteering their husbands for the duty.
Pic above is the MetroDomc, normal. Below, caved in. BTW, it is over 9 acres.
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